How do I tell Mom and Dad that they may need Assisted Living?

You have grown up with active, energetic parents. They have taken care of you and your family their entire lives. Now that your parents are aging, you begin to notice that every day tasks that were once undemanding are now becoming more difficult. You realize it is time to initiate the conversation about residential assisted living and a plan of action for the future.

How will you go about this and what is the proper way to bring up the topic?

It is important that you talk to your parents about long term elderly care before a major illness or crisis occurs. It is a lot easier to discuss scenarios and act on logic when your parents are still in good health. If you choose to wait, you may miss your opportunity.

When initiating the conversation, do not try to tackle everything at once. Ask open -ended questions like “When you think about the future, where do you see yourself?” Try not to be judgmental with their responses and listen to their thoughts and feelings.

It is also important not to overload them with questions. Have several short conversations so that they do not feel you are interrogating them.

Approaching your parents depends on their personality type. Some people need the direct approach, “I noticed your health is declining and we need to discuss living options for the future.” Others prefer an indirect method, “I noticed that Nancy from across the street moved into an adult living facility; do you know anything about that?”…

It is, however, important to be clear with your parents about health and safety, regardless of the style of approach you use. Be factual about any particular needs or their medical prognosis and be honest.

It may also be necessary to bring others to help you during these conversations for moral support or to reiterate the importance of the discussion.

Realizing that it is time for you to address the possibility of assisted living and elderly care housing with your parents can sometimes be unsettling, but don’t feel that you need to tackle the issue all at once. Plan a series of questions to ask your parents and prepare for all types of responses. If necessary, contact a local assisted living facility or the health department for more suggestions and advice.

Sunshine Gardens Senior Community
www.sgwseniors.com

… feel free to contact me here:
kelloggt@durango.net
970-385-4090